Self Review

 I had to write a self review today at work.

You know those "How are you amazing and what could you have done better?" sort of things that I honestly loathe.

Mostly because I find it quite easy to be down on myself and struggle to see my strengths without worrying that I'm sounding boastful. 

It's even more difficult when it felt like all of 2023 I was mostly in survival mode at work.

Well...at least the last half of the year I was. 

Because the end of August saw my bestie leaving work, which meant that I ended up taking on more night shifts and that drained me from all the socialization and then I went straight from work drama to family drama back to work drama....and yah.

Survival mode.

Like I'm not sure I've done better as a manager this year.

I haven't gotten worse.

But I also probably am not meeting all the expectations set upon me either.

Mostly because I've gotten a bit more apathetic towards Corporate and their stupid standards and need to have us do more work with less hours and such. 

*exhales*

But yah.

I had to write a self review today at work. Which boo.

It was also rather stressful because my VP Manager decided to be 'social' and sit right by me to order lunch as I was trying to write out things on the computer.

*face palm*

I'm not surprised it happened. Figured they'd come and sit down the moment I had a chance to go sit down because they're social like that. 

Still frustrating. Like I would like to be left alone as I try to figure out how to talk about my strengths and weaknesses thank you very much.

But yah.

Another self review done. Yaaaay. 

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

Returning to Passion

 I often find it difficult to write...when events happen in my life that....I don't quite want to process yet. 

Since I often use writing to process things...if I don't want to process.... I don't write..

And that's....something I probably need to stop doing to myself.

Like....2023 was a hard year.

Did it help at all to not write about it at like...all?

Nope. No it did not. 

So maybe....I need to just buckle down and try and keep up the goal of writing every day...and process things sooner rather than bottling them up to look at again....like never. 

*exhales*

In any case.

2023 was a hard year.

It felt like I was running on empty. Drained. Listless. 

It felt like I kept giving and giving and giving....and yet didn't get enough back in return to recharge myself and find my energy again.

I'm still not quite ready to go into details of like....the crazy that's been the last year.

But like....maybe it will come out piece by piece....as I'm going to try harder to return to this blog on the daily rather than like once in a blue moon.

Because it's frustrating for sure to be like "I'm going to do this!" and then have an event hit me and then I go "I aint writing about that! I don't want to process it!" 

Which is what happened back in September. 

Writing was going good. I was blogging...not consistently but more often in September than I had been the previous months....

And then we got news that my Grandma Dirchi...my Last Grandparent. Had been diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.

And it was Terminal. To the point where my Daddoo wasn't confident that she'd live to see Christmas. Probably not even Thanksgiving.

And suddenly all my focus went into trying to find time to see her when at that point I was working mostly night shifts. So it wasn't like I could just drive up after work to see her. And it was...hard. Because I was working closing shifts and my Daddoo kept sending texts of like "You should go see Grandma." "You should go see Grandma" "You should go see Grandma." 

And like... I'd already been feeling so much family pressure through most of the year for other reasons and to add on top of that the work stress.....

The rest of September ended up being a blurr.

Like I finally was able to use the last of my vacation time to take time off at the beginning of October and like....the two days before that time off I had been overinundated with noise stimulus at work. With chatty workers. And my general emotional exhaustion. And it got to be too much.

And I had no time to unwind from that work stress because I had taken the beginning of October off to a) Be able to be around for my Godparents who were flying in to see Grandma (as my godfather is my uncle and my Grandma is his Mom) and was trying to be there for all the family coming to gather to say their last goodbyes to her as she had stated that she wanted to live until her Birthday.....

Which Dad, who's worked with cancer patients, stated that usually people who state a date they want to live too...don't end up living too much longer past that point.

And My Grandma made it to her birthday! We had a wonderful day with her and family celebrating her 85th. It was....it was great. A nice last hurrah.

And it was hurrah.

Because she passed away the very next evening.

And it was....hard. Hard because I was present at the house when she passed. And it felt...I felt like I couldn't really grieve because I was trying to be there for my Dad and his wife and Be there for my Godparents and Be there for my other Aunts and Uncles and family members who were there and just....support them.

Have I fully grieved her passing yet?

Probably not. I've been so focused on others on helping ease their way that it's....it's been hard to sit down (write) and find time to focus on myself. My feelings. My emotions. My state of being.

Mostly because I knew I wasn't doing good already. I've been suffering emotionally this past year but couldn't really see a solution to the issue beyond buckling down and hoping I could have a chance to 'rest' later on.

But when it feels like you're going from one crisis to the next.....Like....Guys...I had SIX funerals this year. FIVE of them Family. 

It's...it's hard to try to be emotionally stalwart while others are struggling around you. To be the rock they can lean on for support while you're trying to not crumble yourself.

*exhales*

It's been a hard year.

And like I'm trying to look to the positives. 

Like yes. There were multiple funerals this year. But there was also more opportunities to see family than normal. The occasion may have been sad, but the ability to see family I otherwise might only see maybe once a year...that...that was nice. To catch up with and see them.

I also rediscovered my love of Latch Hooks this past year. As I desperately needed something 'crafty' that I could succeed at and accomplish because writing...writing has been a whole problem. I love to write, but I've struggled so hard to do it this past year and a half.

And being able to go do something with my hands. Complete multiple projects. ACCOMPLISH SOMETHING. It helped. So much. It felt so nice to complete things. And I think I'm finally getting to the point where I can actually sit down and write and get more of my stories out into the world again as I've missed it. 

Alot.

I know the New Year is often one for Goals.

And yes, I've set myself some goals.

But mostly they're goals to like....return to my roots. Find the joy and passion I had in things, like blogging, that I had lost over the last couple of years.

So yah....

Here's to hoping that I'll be able to find that passion and enjoyment again.

Because honestly, I've missed it.

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

193rd General Conference Highlights -Sunday Sessions

 Sunday Morning 

M. Russell Ballard

• We know God is. We know who the Savior is. Becuase we have Joseph Smith. Who went into a Grove of Trees. Seeking relief and forgiveness for his Sins. 
• We are abundantly blessed. To know all that we know. Because we have Joseph Smith.
• Jesus Christ is the Savior and Redeemer of the World. 
• How blessed we are, to know what we know, about our purpose in life. 
• Be a little better, be a little kinder, be a little more prepared. 

Pres Emily Belle Freeman

• We must remember that Christ will allow mortality to do its work within us, but won't allow us to face those challenges alone.
• Christ invites us to walk with him. 
• The Lord will answer us in the day of our distress if we will tether ourselves to Him.
• The Covenant Path is all about our Relationship with God. 
• Christ Will meet us Where we are As we are. 
• Staying where we are won't give us the dilverance we seek. We must move forward, upward. 
• Christ came to lift us. He wants us to Become more. 
• What degree of relationship do you want to have with Christ? 
• Begin where you are. Don't let your condition hinder your progress. 
• Place or Pace on the Path doesn't matter so long as you progress. 
• We walk this path together, calling out encouragement along the way.

Adilson de Paula Parrella

• Our Conduct is our Living Testimony. 
• Is our Meeting centered on Jesus Christ so we can feel the Spirit? 
• Live what you Believe. 

Quintein L. Cook

• We live in a time where peaceful followers of Christ experience unique challenges. 
• Choose the role of a Peacemaker. Now. and Always.
• Our Heavenly Destiny isn't altered when we suffer diversity. 
• Trials are a part of mortality. They occur in everyone's life throughout the world. 
• Fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever.
• Those who faithfully keep the commandments are blessed in all things. 
• Give heed to the words of the Prophets.
• Earth has no Sorrow that Heaven cannot Heal.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf

• Giving into worldly morals may give you happiness for a moment, but it is fleeting and hard to keep, unlike the teachings of Christ.
• It's not about comparing rewards and celebrations. This is about healing. 
• Our Heavenly Father will run to us, heart overrun with compassion when he sees us returning to Him.
• Heaven will rejoice in our return.
• It is not possible for you to sink lower than the light of Christ's infinite atonement shines.
• Though choices may have taken you away from Him and the Church, there's always a road leading back home and God is there to welcome us home.
• What is given to one does not at all diminish the birthright given to others. 
• Jesus Christ is our Strength.

W. Christopher Waddell

• Events which impact our lives and even the course of history, are frequently the results of individual men and women. 
• Do not allow hero worship to become idol worship. 
• Whatever questions or problems you have, the answer is always found in the teachings and life of Jesus Christ.
• Choosing the right hero has eternal consequences. 
• If you have not chosen the kingdom of God first, it will in the end make no difference what you've chosen instead. 
• There be many gods and heroes we're invited to worship and embrace, but there is only One who is guaranteed to deliver his promises to us. 

Henry B. Eyring

• The Lord speaks to us personally through the Holy Ghost.
• You can be taught and learn from the Spirit through a series of experiences. 
• I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded.
• We need the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. 
• God does hear us. God does see us. God does love us. 
• Daily repentance is the pathway to purity. And purity brings power. 
• If you want to receive the companionship of the Holy Ghost you must want that companionship for the right reasons. 

Sunday Afternoon 

Dale G. Renlund

• Are you searching for things far off that can be found underneath your feet? 
• We need to guard against the tendency to look beyond the mark and fail to recognize Christ in our lives. 
• Jesus Christ is our Treasure.
• Our spiritual foundation is strengthened through repentance. 
• Only with a robust spiritual foundation can we handle the metaphorical rain, wind, and floods that come into our lives. 
• Our commitment to attend the temple should be as strong when the temple is nearby as when it is far away. 
• When we trust God's prophet and act on his counsel, we will find happiness and we too can be healed. We need to look no further. 
• Treasure the opportunity to repent. 

John C. Pingree Jr.

• Our need to recognize truth has never been more important. 
• Truth is eternal. 
• Truth helps us avoid deception and know good from evil. 
• God is the source of Eternal Truth.
• The Holy Ghost testifies of All Truth. 
• Prophets receive Truth from God and share that Truth with Us.
• God expects us to seek, recognize, and act on Truth.
• When seeking Truth it's helpful to know the difference between Doctrine and Policy. 
• While Doctrine never changes, Policies can adjust from time to time. 
• Communicate Clearly to avoid Misunderstanding.
• Truth needs to be taught with Love. 
• Love without Truth is hollow and lacks the promise of Growth. 

Valeri V. Cordon

• Parenting is one of life's most extraordinary experiences. 
• We must climb to higher ground of gospel culture in our families.
• Jesus Christ is the center of Gospel Culture. 
• The Home should be the center of Gospel Learning.
• Teach Freely. Model Discipleship. Invite to Act
• Faith in Jesus Christ should be the core of each child's testimony.
• God will do everything he can, short of violating your agency, to help you attain every blessing of eternity.
• We cannot wait for conversion to simply happen to our children. Accidental conversion is not a principle of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

J. Kimo Esplin

• Temple covenants are gifts from our Heavenly Father to us. 
• The reward for keeping covenants with God is Heavenly Power.

Gerrit W. Gong

• We speak love in many languages.
• 3. Ways to speak the Language of Love: 1. The Language of Warmth and Reverence. 2. The Language of Service and Sacrifice. 3. Covenant Belonging
• Your daily sacrifices matter. 
• Sometimes we need to know that Love spoken here is heard and appreciated here. 
• Let us be understanding and kind as we learn new languages of love together.
• The words we use can draw us closer or distance us from others. 
• If I had, I would give, and offer all I can.
• We serve where called. 
• Love is spoken Here. There. And Everywhere as we answer yes to callings to serve the Lord.
• Sociality and Service often Go Together.
• When we covenant all we are we can become more than we are. 

Christopher G. Giraud-Carrier

• Man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh upon the heart.
• See the individual for who they are and administer accordingly to each one.
• See with your heart. See the child of God within everyone. 
• The adversary rejoices in labels because they divide us and restrict how we think about ourselves. 
• There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. We are all Divine in Nature.
• How we treat each other really matters. How we speak to each other really matters. 
• The way we treat each other is a reflection of our understanding of the sacrifice and atonement of Christ. 

Russell M. Nelson

• Heavenly Father's plan for us is Fabulous. What we do in our life really matters. The Savior's Atonement is what makes our Father's plan possible. 
• An understanding of God's plan takes the mystery out of life and gives a firm understanding of our future. 
• Think Celestial 
• To be Spiritually Minded is Life Eternal (S.M.I.L.E.)
• Your choices today will determine 3 things. Where you will live in eternity, the body you'll be resurrected with, and those with whom you will live forever.
• Begin with the End in Mind.
• How and Whom and With Who do you want to Live forever? 
• Obedience paves the way for a joyful life today and a grand eternal reward tomorrow.
• When you are confronted with a dilemma think celestial. When tested by temptation. Think celestial. When life or loved ones let you down. Think celestial. 
• Do you have 'too much temple' in you? 
• Thinking Celestial can enhance your Career.
• Our prayers can be and should be living discussions with our Heavenly Father. 
• Any addiction be it gaming, gambling, drug, alcohol. sex, or even food, offends God because your Obessions becomes your God. You look to it rather than to Him for solace. 
• Your obsessions become your God.
• Please don't allow your obsession to rob you of your freedom. 
• Public opinion is not the arbitrator of Truth.
• Don't question your testimony when others are doubting.
• Never take counsel from those who do not believe. Seek guidance from those you can trust. 
• As you think Celestial. Your Faith will Increase.
• Was the Church any different because you pay your tithing? No. However, becoming a full tithe payer can change you. 
• Paying tithing is all about faith, not money. 
• Build your Faith.
• 20 New Temples!!

To read/watch/see/listen to the talks given today in their entirety please visit: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2023/10?lang=eng

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.

Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

193rd Semiannual General Conference Highlights - Saturday Sessions

 Saturday Morning 

David A. Bednar

• Press forward. Even when you're worn and tired, even disheartened. Press forward. Trust in the Lord that he is with you and guiding you. 
• If all Men had been, were, and ever would be like Moroni, the Powers of Hell would have been shaken. The devil would never have had power over men. 
• Even though you're not as noticable or consipicious as more famous people, you can be as helpful and as useful. 
• If you feel what you do this year and in the years to come isn't noticed, take heart, the best people to ever live weren't taken note of either. Serving faithfully and quietly. 
• Observe to keep the commandments and statues of the Lord. 
• Strive with unweary diligence. 
• If you've turned away from God, turn humbly once again to him. Seek him. Come unto him. 
• Joy cometh in the morning. 
• Trust in the Lord even when the righteous desires of your heart aren't met in the timeline or way that you hoped. 
• Stand guard like a lioness at the gate of your home. 
• Love and Serve. Listen and Learn. Care and Console. Teach and Testify. 

Amy A. Wright

• If you knew you would meet the Lord tomorrow, what would you do today to prepare? 
• Because of Christ, everything can be Okay.
• Abiding the Day does not mean adding to an ever increasing To Do list. 
• You need to simplify. Focus your efforts. 
• We cannot share our Oil, but we can share His Light. 
• Nothing we have or have not done is beyond the Lord's infinite reach or sacrifice. He is the reason why it's Never the End of our Story.
• Look to Christ and Live. 

Robert M. Daines

• Are we so focused on our own needs and desires that we're ignoring the sacrifices of others around us for us? 
• Are you lipsyncing instead of singing the song of redeeming love? 
• Reach out and offer love and hope to someone on the margins. 
• The more you learn about the Savior, the easier it is to trust in him and his plan. 
• God is the Father of all Mercies and all Comfort. 
• We worship our Father, not a Formula. 
• We aren't finished until we see Christ as the Face of our Father's love, and follow Him and not our Rules. 
• Our Covenants are fundamental to our Relationships. They're not rules to earn His love. He already loves us perfectly, our purpose is to understand His love for us. 
• Covenants are the Shape of God's Embrace. 
• To serve in this Church is to Stand in the River of God's love.

Carlos A. Godoy

• You will be happier in life with the Gospel of Christ in your life. 
• The decision of one can affect a whole chain of descendants. 
• Anything broken can be mended through Jesus Christ.
• Our Decisions of Today will affect our Future and the Future of our Family Members. 
• We should be more Valiant instead of lukewarm for our own sakes and the sake of our posterity. 

D. Todd Christofferson

• Unless Authority is given, Ordinances cannot be administered in Righteousness. 
• Sealing Authority is necessary for ANY ordinances performed in the church.
• If nothing had come from the restoration but the sealing power, it would have been worth the cost.
• God's pattern with family can Begin with You. You can add strength to your chain and perhaps help to restore the broken links. 
• The reason why the Earth was created was so that Families could be formed and sealed together. 
• No one can be Exalted alone.

Ian S. Ardern

• Your good works brighten the lives and lighten the load of those who need it desperately. 
• Compassion has no bounds.
• Despite our efforts, we won't heal every one we encounter, but we can make a difference in the lives of everyone we encounter. 
• Give what you're able, then allow Christ to make the final effort. 
• It is unlikely you'll know the recipients of your dollars, your time, your compassion. But have faith that your efforts are helping and changing others.
• Turn your heart towards the wellbeing of others.

Dallin H. Oaks

• Our Heavenly Father loves all His children so much that he wants All his Children to live in a Kingdom of Glory for forever. 
• All the children of God, will ultimately inherit one of three kingdoms of Glory.
• Exaltation can only be obtained through faithfulness in Covenants made. 
• The Plan completely honors your agency.
• The Gospel of Christ challenges to Become Something rather than just Knowing Something. 
• Because of Christ and His Atonement, when we fall short in this life we can repent and rejoin the Covenant path.
• Salvation is an individual matter, but Exaltation is a Family matter. 
• God won't force us to be in a sealing relationship against our will. 

Saturday Afternoon

Neil L. Anderson

• As we are honest in our tithes, God will open the windows of heaven and pour out blessings insomuch that there will be no room to receive them. 
• The windows of heaven open in many ways. Some are temporal, some are spiritual. Some are subtle and easy to overlook. Trust in the Lord's timing. The blessings will Always Come. 
• The only permanent solution to poverty on the earth is the Gospel of Christ.
• As you trust in the Lord, the blessings of God will follow.
• Your tithes are allowing the blessings of the Temple to be in places only the Lord could forsee.
• Because of your tithes, the Church is being established in places you may never visit or know. But they are making a difference. 
• The spiritual power of tithing isn't decided by the amount contributed but by the power of the trust we've placed in the Lord. 
• The blessings of tithing come in many ways. 
• If you pay your tithing, you will want for nothing.
• There will be those who cheer us forward and those who do not. 

Jan E. Newman

• Each person must dig deep to find the Rock. We each must put in our own efforts to find a firm foundation to stand on.
• To build our lives upon the rock of the Savior, we must dig deep, moving the sand away, so that we can establish a firm foundation.
• For the Rising Generation it's not enough for Faith in the Lord to be a tradition of the older generations. They must learn and know for themselves.
• Don't let the voice of the Covenant people be silenced in the Rising Generation. Teach them. Have them come to know Jesus. 
• Feast upon the Words of Christ Daily. As we do so we'll be told how to face the difficulties in life that we never thought we'd have to face. 
• What does Feasting Upon the Lord look like? It looks like whatever works for You and Your Family and then strive to do better each day. 
• Don't give up. Don't worry about accomplishing something grand every time. Just be consistent in your efforts. 
• We cannot allow our covenant voice to become muted or silenced when it comes to Him.
• You are doing much better than you think. Just keep working at it. 
• You may forget the Savior for a season, but I promise you He will never Forget You. 

Joaquin E. Costa

• The source of our Strength is Faith in Jesus Christ.
• Faith in Christ is what gives us the energy to face the trials in our lives. 
• Our Covenants aren't Transactional, they're Transformational.
• We don't come to Jesus because we're perfect. We come because we want to become perfect through him.
• In the days we fail to remember the Lord, he is still there. He'll be there tomorrow always to comfort and to tell us that he loves us. 
• The reward for keeping the commandments and covenants of God is Heavenly Power. Heavenly power to withstand and have strength to get through the trials in our lives.
• Trust in God. He brings power to our weakness, and comfort to our grief. 

Gary E. Stevenson

• God given gifts make gifted people. 
• God endows his children with many spiritual gifts, making them spiritually gifted people. 
• A gift alone does not a master make. It is through painstaking practice and effort in order to reach the highest levels of artistry. 
• Exercising spiritual gifts requires spiritual exercise. 
• 4 Guiding Principles in Recognizing the Promptings of the Spirit
• 1. Stand in Holy Places
• 2. Stand with Holy People
• 3. Testify of Holy Truths as Often as You can.
• 4. Listen to the Holy Spirit
• If you hope to feel the Spirit, be in a place where the Spirit can easily dwell. 
• The Spirit cannot be restrained from attending a gathering of holy people. If you hope to feel the Spirit, be with people where the Spirit can easily dwell.
• Find your strength in numbers. Find good friends. Be good friends. Stand with holy people.
• The Comforter always shares his voice when we use our voice on his behalf. 
• The Spirit doesn't get our attention by shouting and shaking, but by whispering and nudging. 
• Spiritual matters cannot be forced. You can cultivate an environment to encourage spiritualness to occur, but you cannot force it. 
• You do not need to be led in the Spirit in ALL things. Use your intelligence and act with your best understanding. 
• A desire to be led by the Spirit is a strength, but it needs to be partnered with our own understanding.
• If we do not receive guidance from the Spirit, we should use our best judgement. 
• Look at the Mirror and say to yourself: Wow. Look at me! I'm amazing! I'm a child of God. God loves me. Knows me. And wants the best for me. 

Yoon Hwan Choi

• If we want Joy. Stay on the Path. If you want to be Happy. Make Covenants and Keep them in our Lives. 
• You may ask Heavenly Father for peace, but the answer may be different than the one you're expecting. 
• The Greatest lesson we can learn in Mortality is that when God speaks and we obey, we will always be right. 
• Whenever we're asked to serve in a calling, he sees our needs and the blessings we can be given and the trials we can overcome as we serve. 
• As we Yoke ourselves to Christ, we can do things we can't do on our own because he can help us. 
• Keeping Covenants actually makes life easier. 

Alan T. Phillips

• Life is challenging. You may feel overwhelmed, isolated, exhausted. Know that you are a child of God and members of his Family will restore a sense of belonging and purpose. 
• You are not an accidental by product of nature, a cosmic orphan, where there is design there is a Designer. Your life has meaning and purpose. 
• Religion is not only about our relationship with God, it is also about our relationship with each other. 
• True Religion is the Tie that Binds us to God and to Each Other. 
• How we treat one another truly matters. 
• Our Journey to God is often found Together. 
• Judge less. Love more. Extend the pure love of Christ through our words and actions. 
• Christ is our Rescuer and the Healer of our Souls.
• We are not and never need be alone.
• Faith requires work. 
• Faith can be challenging and requires choices. But prayers are answered and answers can be felt. Some of the realest things in life can't be seen but Are Felt. 

Ronald A. Rasband

• The Lord needs you.
• If ye have desires to serve God, then ye are called to the work.
• We need you. We. Need. You.
• Take your know how, coupled with your time honored testimonies and go and serve. 

Saturday Evening 

Gary B. Sabin

• There are many things that are interesting in this world, but few are truly important. 
• Building upon the foundation of Christ is essential to our happiness. 
• In spite of our limitations so long as we try our best we will hear from the Lord. "Well done." 
• Our life is a purposeful adventure. 
• Withhold not good from them when it is due when it is in your power to do so.
• Part of greatness is kindness.
• If our weaknesses were revealed, hopefully we'd be more considerate and welcoming of others and they too would return the favor to us. 
• A true follower of Christ is known by how compassionate they treat other people. 
• Seeing life from an eternal vantage point provides clarity, comfort and hope. 
• Do not take your blessings for granted. Life becomes magical when blessings are appreciated. 
• Gratitude gives birth to a multitude of other virtues. 

Joni L. Koch

• When we choose not to be humble, we end up being humiliated. 
• Humility is a willingness to submit to the will of the Lord. It is being teachable. It is a vital catalyst for Spiritual Growth. 
• Are we letting God prevail in our lives? 
• Let our strong opinions be swallowed by even stronger conviction. 
• After you've done everything you can, leave the rest in God's hands. He'll help out with the rest. 

Tamara W. Runia

• Are you too focused on the little picture? Do you need to zoom out to see the big picture?
• Viewing from a new vantage point changes everything. It can change things to a size that seems more manageable. 
• Because of Christ. It all works out. It's all gonna be okay. 
• Worry feels a lot like love...but it's not the same. Take a more hopeful approach. 
• Everyone needs a cheerleader. Someone who lovingly reminds you that You Can. 
• You don't chase after your loved ones who feel love. You call to them. Stand where you are. 
• Choose hope. 
• Silence the critical voice and instead focus on what your children are already doing and cheering them on. 
• Is what you're about to do or say helpful...or hurtful? 
• Tell your loved ones in spoken and unspoken ways what they long to hear. 
• Your kids want you to listen to them and not listen to a lecture. 
• Stay on your knees until your casual prayer turns mighty. 
• Our Hope changes the way they see themselves and who they really are. 
• Our direction is more important than our speed. 
• If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go together the pace will be slow and steady. 
• The Lord has the power to turn any nightmare you're going through into a blessing. 
• Provide a hope and a heart your children can come home to.
• Others need your love more than your judgement. 
• Love is the thing that changes hearts. It is the purest motive of all and others can feel it.
• No home is a failure unless it stops trying.
• Those who love the most and the longest, win. 

Ulisses Soares

• Have respect for all of God's children. Abandon prejudice. 
• We all have divine nature, heritage, and potential. 
• Promote respect. 
• We need to do whatever we can in our spheres of influence to preserve the dignity and respect every son and daughter of God deserves. 
• There is no place for prejudiced thoughts or actions in the community of saints. 
• Find more what we have in common than what we have as differences.
• We're all from the same origin river in God, but we flow through different cultures and ethnicities. 

To read/watch/see these talks in their entirety please visit: 

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2023/10?lang=eng

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

Surprise!

 Working Retail you kinda come to expect having to deal with random and odd things. 

Most of the time it's people related odd things.

But then occasionally something just...weird happens.

Take the other night.

I was the closing manager on duty which meant that I'm in charge of counting the tills at the end of the night and balancing everything and getting the deposit ready and such.

And we have these black boxes at each register that we use to hold the bigger bills that we get in in the store.

These black boxes are opened at least once a day every day. Because we at least have to check them at night to make sure there's no money in there when we balance the till.

So I go to close down the last register.

Which is usually the first register. aka the register that gets used all the time. And therefore ALWAYS has money in the black box because we rely mostly on register 1 for customers and use the remainder mostly for backing up if the lines get long.

And I pull out the black box. 

Open the back.

Reach in to grab the wad of bills and coupons in there.

and a MOTH flies out of the box and at my face!!!

A MOTH

Like. This box is opened DAILY. 

HOW did a MOTH get into that?!?!!? 

And it wasn't like one of those tiny moths either.

No the body was at least the size of a quarter if not bigger. 

*shakes head*

I'm assuming that it somehow managed to climb in through the money slit overnight and couldn't get back out. 

It's just....so weird.

Like you don't expect a bug to come out at you from there. Ever.

Like EVER.

Crazy.

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves. 
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

Where Was the Common Sense?

*exhales* 

Sometimes....sometimes I wonder what in the world is going on in my coworker's heads. 

Especially with our current newbie. 

Like I know they mean well. I know that they try to make things....easier....but they end up making life more difficult at work. 

It's like a "That was a cool idea...but bad execution." sort of thing.

But mostly it's a "How did you get THAT out of what you were TOLD?" 

Like.....

So yesterday and today we had a Fish Adoption Event at my store.

The first of it's kinda really. As Starsmet hasn't ever done one to my knowledge. 

Where we got in 47 larger fish that were in need of homes. (46 technically as 1 Silver Dollar unfortunately didn't survive the trip to our store) 

And like since we've never done this before...there's been a bit of a learning curve with it.

Like realizations of "Hey this fish are gonna be a lot bigger than our normal fish....how are we gonna safely get them home?"

Which the solution was to have the DC send us extra bags for the larger fish.

But one of my other coworkers also had the idea to save the styrofoam boxes that all the fish came in so that we could place our largest fish in bags and then put them in the box so that they could safely travel. As some of the koi and catfish we got in were as long as my forearm if not as long as my arm. So like...HUGE compared to our normal under hand sized fish. 

And yesterday our Greenie coworker was the closing Petcare. 

But it was okay because one of our experienced workers was there to show them the ropes. To show the greenie how to catch the larger fish and fill out paperwork and such.

Only it appears that the knowledge went in one ear and right out the other. *exhales* 

My greenie coworker had watched my experienced coworker catch one of the larger koi and place it in a large bag and then place it in a styrofoam box for the customer to take home.

We only had like...12 of those boxes. And I know 2 were used yesterday before I left. 

My Head Manager came in around 11 this morning.

In time to hear my Greenie coworker (who got the unfortunate clopening shift of closing last night and opening this morning) ask "Hey can you get more boxes from the back?"

Only...there were NO more boxes. 

Which was weird because They should have only been used for our largest fish. The 6 giant Koi potentially 3-6 of the larger catfish and like maybe 3 of the Cichlids we got in. 

Which there were still THREE large koi and THREE large catfish and ONE large Cichlid that would potentially need those boxes here in the store. 

So we should have STILL had boxes.

But we didn't.

Why???

Because my greenie saw my more experienced coworker put the koi in a bag in a box for the customer for the adoption event and just assumed that ALL of the adoption fish had to be taken out that way. No matter the size.

Which meant that customers took home 5-8 inch fish that didn't really need the boxes home in these GIANT boxes and GIANT bags. 

Just.... just.....ugggggggghhhh.

Like WHERE was the common sense? 

WHERE?!?! 

HOW could you look at our smaller handsized fish and think "Yes, this fish needs a giant bag and box!!" 

I just...I don't understand.

And it's sooo frustrating because it left us scrambling to figure out HOW to potentially get any of the OTHER fish home. 

Our current solution is to just use our large garbage bags and double or triple bag the fish.

But luckily no other fish were adopted after I came in to work....

But it's just....a headache. Like. WHY. I know the greenie meant well. But WHY. 

*exhales*

Still. Our adoption event was a success overall I feel.

As we managed to adopt out 25 fish out of 46!! :D So just barely over half the fish found homes! Woot!!

Though that leaves us with 21 fish that are still looking for homes. 

*shakes head*

Currently we have the space for them, thankfully, to hang out at our store. But hopefully we can find them homes sooner rather than later. We'll have to see how it goes. 

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves. 
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

Upcoming Upheaval

 I received some ... ... not great news this morning. 

My Grandma Dirchi, the last Grandparent I have....ended up in the ER last night because apparently she's been unable to go to the bathroom for a couple of days. 

Which. Is not good. 

Further testing has shown a mass on her Pancreas. 

And the doctor has confirmed that what he's seeing looks like an Advanced Stage of Pancreatic Cancer with a Tumor that's compressing the vessels that go into her abdomen and liver. 

They're waiting for more results to get a better idea of what's going on.

But there's a strong chance that my grandma won't see the end of the year. She may not even make it to Thanksgiving.

And it's....hard to think about.

Like you never want someone to pass away. Especially family.  

But in another sense I've been.....kinda expecting something like this? Like I've known that my Grandma hasn't been doing the best recently and that she's been in a decline. 

But there's a difference in knowing that she's going to pass away sometime in the future....and in knowing that it's gonna happen sooner rather than later. 

There's also all the thoughts of 'what isn't going to happen now.' 

Like knowing that when I do eventually get married and have kids....my kids will never know any of their great-grandparents. 

But there's also the thoughts of what has happened. Like she's not going to see me married with kids, but at least she has seen my siblings get married and at least my siblings have a couple of pictures of grandma holding their babies. 

It's...yah....it's mixed feelings.

And I honestly don't quite know how to react to it all.

Part of it is because I have a bunch of other stressors on my plate currently. Most of them work related. And this year I've been kinda in a "focus on this crisis and then worry about the next crisis after this crisis is over" mode. 

So my focus this week has been mostly on the Fish Adoption event happening tomorrow and Saturday.

But now I also have the worry of being able to see my Grandma at least once more, but being comforted in the fact that I saw her just a couple of weeks ago as I had dropped by to visit her after I'd finished helping my Brother with a bit of cleaning up of his house and helping him and his family move out. 

There's the stress of knowing that my Daddoo is gonna be returning early from his Summer Home (they were planning to be back next month but the deadline has been greatly pushed up) to be here for his Mom, but at the same time knowing that My Brother and his Family are currently living in my Daddoo's Winter Home as there's been a bit of a gap between them moving out of their old home and moving into their new home. 

There's the pressure knowing that more than likely the two families will be living under the same roof for a couple of weeks. Because there's no way for my brother to move into his house sooner when both he and his wife are working and thought they still had nearly two months to get out of Daddoo's home and that they'll need help moving out quicker but my work schedule prevents me from being able to help when they need help. 

There's the stress of knowing that my godparents will be flying out 'soon' to also see Grandma and that they will be staying with me, but I most likely won't be able to get the time off from work to chauffer them around and might not see much of them because again I've been scheduled mostly closing shifts since my bestie left. So there's a bit of conflict and stress there as well.

There's....just so much going on right now....

I just....I'm not sure how to feel. 

So yah. Rough day. Lots of feelings and thoughts. 

I just hope that it all goes...well...as well as it can go. 

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves. 
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi