A Teary Moment

Christmas was different this year.

I mean...how can it not be? 

With Mother Dearest not there. 

I mean, she was there in spirit I'm sure.

But like...physically there.

There to watch us open presents.

There to give us gifts.

There to laugh and smile and see our reactions and have us see her reactions to opening gifts.

Still....

I managed to push away the thoughts.

To just focus on enjoying everyone opening their presents. 

Seeing their reactions.

Having a bit of fun and laughing and enjoying that my presents to the family were a success. 

And then after everything.

Kikay brought out some 'last' gifts from Mother Dearest.

And I just....lost it. 

Like how can you not? 

When you know it's kinda a 'last' present from her?

Though it's not as simple as that. 

You see... a few weeks before Mother Dearest passed away.

Kikay had had a dream.

Where she and Mother Dearest were shopping in a Temple Giftshop.

Looking for gifts for each family member. 

And it was just vivid enough of a dream that it kinda stuck in Kikay's mind.

How each gift was meant to symbolize something to us and what we should value/feel/remember etc.

And since Mother Dearest had passed away....before doing any Christmas Shopping as far as I'm aware.

After some consideration.

Kikay decided to go ahead and actually get us each the gift that she and Mother Dearest had decided on in the dream. 

For me it was a Pocketwatch necklace with a Rose on it.

As in the dream Mother Dearest had stated she wanted me to get a necklace.

And over the summer I'd written a novella length story. 

Involving a pocketwatch with a design on it.

It was basically the only story Mother Dearest had read of mine that I'd written.

Mostly because I hadn't shared my stories with her.

Because they're all fanfics lol. ^^;; So most of them you need a bit of background in the fandom in order to know what's going on.

But this fic involving the pocketwatch had been one where you didn't need a background on the characters/fandom in order to enjoy the story.

So while we had been on vacation in Arizona during September.

She'd taken the time to read it.

And told me it was one of the best stories she'd ever read.

Which aww.

Such a happy feel good moment for me. 

To have her read something I wrote and like it. Enjoy it. Compliment it. 

It's been a memory I've been holding rather close.

Knowing that she'd read at least one of my stories and liked it.

It's been a comfort.

So yah.

Totally cried when I opened 'Mom's' present and saw the pocketwatch.

Cried even more so when Kikay said it was so I could remember how much Mom loved me and such.

And yah.

It was just a tender moment.

Bittersweet for sure. 

Just...so grateful that Mother Dearest took the time to read my story.

And that Kikay went through the effort to make this Christmas meaningful.

To have a 'last' gift from Mother Dearest. 

It meant a lot. 

Until you next see these words;

I'll be watching the leaves.

Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi