Toe Pain

It's weird....how the human body works.

Like just how it reacts to things. 

Like one day everything is fine. And then in the next moment something is 'WRONG' and you're in PAIN and you don't know WHY.

Yah.

I've been dealing with that for the past week or so.

With my Big Toe.

Like I think I noticed it when I took a long shower the other day. Because I had a migraine (again) and was trying to beat my muscles into relaxing via hot water.

When I realized my toe was aching more than normal.

But I didn't think much of it. Thought I might have just cramped it from sitting in the tub for so long in a balled position. 

But it happened again with the next shower.

And like...I couldn't see anything wrong with my toe though it did feel a bit tender.

And I was like...maybe I just need to cut my nails? As like sometimes I realize that I've let my toe nails grow a bit longer than they probably should be and so I cut them back so they don't, I don't know...rub wrong against my shoes and my socks and such.

But the other day I ended up taking a closer look at this big toe. As it was feeling more tender.

And decided that maybe I should cut the nail back a bit more than I usually do.

Because maybe I'd somehow gotten a splinter or something and it was irritating me? It was hard to know. 

But I just...messed with my toe and nail to try and figure out where the source of this pain was coming from as it was mostly focused on the inside tip of my toe. And while there seemed to be a slight callus there or maybe just a bump of dried skin...it didn't seem like much.

But I could tell that it was tender by the nail as in just cutting away and filing and such...the inside edge of the nail was suuuppeeeerr tender. Like eye watering pain tender.

Which probably indicates some sort of infection or irritation affecting the nail...under the nail. 

As there was also a bit of like...white pus that came out from under my toe....and over the past week it's gotten more painful to like walk around on it.

And tonight...ah yah.

It was bad.

Like my toe was a bit sore already because yesterday? Sunday? I ended up making myself bleed in trying to figure out where the pain was coming from and in the process I created like a sort of blood blister or something? Or just clipped a little bit too much dead skin away who knows....but like...yah my toe hurt.

And I had decided that there was the possibility that I was dealing with an ingrown toenail.

Which I'm honestly at a loss as to how that happened....as I usually have my shoes roomier because my pinky toes aren't quite normal...but I'm guessing it might be the socks I was wearing...maybe they were too tight and squishing my toes together weird or something. Who knows.

But tonight. My toe was in agony. Like it was difficult to stay on my feet sort of agony.

Which is not good when you're working a closing shift and you're the only manager on duty. *exhales*

So I kinda just had to deal with the pain, deal with the heat I could feel radiating from the inside edge of my big toe. 

But as soon as I got home? Nope. No more.

I gritted my teeth and got to work doing a bit of a more thorough investigation of the nail, trying to see and pull away the very tender skin in the process, if there was like a piece of nail I had missed that was jabbing into the skin and causing me all this pain.

Apparently there was.

It took a bit of time...as I kept having to stop because OUCH PAIN. 

But I think I managed to get the annoyance out. 

As the pain has been a lot less since then.

I mean there's still a bit of tenderness to the area...considering all the manipulating and pulling and tugging and digging I was doing to try and find the source of my agony.

But hopefully I fixed the toenail. Hopefully it won't grow back into the skin...but I'll definitely have to keep a closer eye on it for the next little while to make sure. 

In the meantime...it's kinda like....I just gotta let the toe recover. Let the areas that were jabbed and prodded and stabbed heal from the trauma. As until I have those more on the mend...it's hard to know if its just healing pain or agony pain. 

Guess we'll find out. 

*exhales* Silly toe. Why do you have to be so high maintenance all of a sudden? 

Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves. 
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi