There's a sort of exhaustion that hits where literally the only thing you can do is go to bed. Because like....there's not really any higher brain power going on. There's no energy to think. No energy to type. No energy to read. Barely any energy to watch something.
And it always catches me off guard when I get those 'super exhausted' days.
Especially when they happen on days where I got enough sleep.
Like you kinda expect the super exhausted crash out after getting like 2-4 hours of sleep the night before.
But the nights where you get a full night's rest?
It's really weird to feel the deep exhaustion set in at like 7pm and the want to just crash in bed fighting with the night owl tendency to stay up late.
I suppose the crash out yesterday wasn't fully unexpected.
As it was our Truck Day.
And working product, lifting heavy bags, moving things around the store for hours on end ... it's tiring. It's exhausting.
So I'm always a little more tired Tuesday nights, but even then....last night felt a bit more extreme.
And I'm sure there were a ton of contributing factors that just...weighed in on the exhaustion levels.
The first being me working a slightly longer shift.
Like half an hour extra at work shouldn't have made that much of a difference, especially because we had truck basically done half an hour before I was off so I wasn't really doing much in the last half hour.
But I also think the mental and emotional stressors were a bit higher yesterday as well.
Why?
Because it was one of my other manager's 'last day' at work.
So I think there was a lot of back burner stress in my mind because like "Do I know everything they know so we can function without them? Am I missing anything? Will I be a good replacement if I get promoted for that position? Have I learned what I need to learn? What happens if I can't find the thing?" And of course all the background "They're never gonna do this and never gonna do that." and "I won't be able to ask them this or that or this or that."
Though they did tell me if I needed help that I could still contact them with questions. Which is sweet though I'm gonna try to not do that.
Kinda not a great look to ask the person who left the job about the job lol. But at the same time they've kinda been a savant in their position so they literally know 'everything' that it's hard to 'teach' everything.
It's also hard because it's unknown if this is a permanent goodbye or not.
As the manager is stepping down as a manager to go back to school. But may come back to be like a part time worker if the school work load isn't too crazy for them.
But we won't know that answer for sure for a couple of weeks. So who knows.
Still.
Gonna be weird having them gone as they've been in the store nearly as long as I have.
In any case. There is all that background emotional stress going on while also trying to get the truck worked as quickly as possible because yesterday was the last day for this manager who usually helps to finish the truck today with what we don't get done the day before but wouldn't because yesterday was their last day....
But there's also other stressors that I shouldn't be stressing about but am stressing about because that's who I am as a person apparently.
Like money is always an issue and with me taking the new management position with the stupid management restructuring that corporate did, I also took a slight pay cut as well. Which while not the end of the world...has also left me not liking the state of how my finances are either.
It doesn't help that corporate is being stupidly tight fisted with hours and making it difficult for us to be scheduled a full 40 hours a week because we DON'T HAVE THE HOURS to do that.
Not when we've been cut at least 80 hours each week compared to the same week last year.
It's nearly impossible.
But HM said that our DM said in their weekly meeting that all managers should be scheduled at a full 40 each week. Which would be great! Because more money!
But is BAD because corporate isn't GIVING US THE HOURS to schedule the managers full time. NOT without TAKING AWAY those hours from associates. Like in order to get all the managers up to a full 40 hours each week we'd have to take away just under 30 hours a week from the associates.
Which they're already working shorter shifts and less days as it is.
If we cut them any further it wouldn't surprise me if they'll start looking for other jobs.
Because it's rather hard to survive if your job is only sceduling 3ish shifts a week and those shifts are like maybe 6 hours.
People can't live off of that. And if people can't live off of that they're gonna start looking for work elsewhere.
Which is stressful. Like even if the managers get up to a full 40 hours that doesn't mean we'll be able to have more time to do our Manager tasks. No. Those hours will be spent doing the tasks that the Cashiers and the Petcare people should be doing but aren't because we don't have enough hours anymore to schedule them the full day.
It's stressful.
Because it feels like corporate is doing their best to take us down to pandemic staffing again and THAT SUCKED.
Like I don't remember what amount of cashiers we had. But it literally was the six managers, me and one petcare person. And maybe one or two cashiers. Like we had NO ONE. If ONE person got sick we were basically SCREWED because we didn't have anyone else to bring in.
It sucked. Big time.
Like cutting 3/4s of your staff is a stupid and horrible thing to do especially in the middle of a pandemic. And I don't like that the trend with hours seems to be forcing us to go in that direction again. Because it. is. not. fun.
It's just more stress. And more upset customers because there's no people to help them.
*exhales*
So yah.
No wonder I got home from work and basically just wanted to pass out.
It was an exhausting day on multiple levels.
But the one bright side of the day is that the manager who's left told me that out of everyone in these tore, if we were hiring internally to replace them, that I would be the best person to replace them.
Which is high praise from them. ^^;;
They later went on to say that I caught on quick in the last couple of months learning how to do all the stocking tasks and that I've been doing really well with all my tasks.
Which again is amazing.
Because until that point I had no idea if they thought I was good replacement material or not.
I mean I hoped I would be.
I went into my current position with the expectation that I would be learning how to do this manager's job so that I could take over for them when and if they decided to step down. As I wasn't as familiar with the stocking aspects of the store so a few months to learn the ropes would be helpful and help me ease into what I need to know for the position.
So to hear that the manager thought I would do well as a replacement was one less stress on my shoulders at least. Now to just pass through the interviewing process when we hold that and hope that I get the position. *fingers crossed*
But yah.
It was an exhausting day.
Exhausting enough that it triggered a migraine towards the end of my shift that trying to go to bed early did not help......but at least the Nurtec made it go away so yay!
Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!
-Sarnic Dirchi
No comments:
Post a Comment