Facing the Fear

I had a customer come into the store today.
Who, had a bit of a change of personality after experiencing a bad fall that messed up their back.
To the point where they're still suffering from the effects of that fall two years later.
Where they became socially anxious, fearful of falling, would fall into panic attacks at the thought of having to go somewhere....
Which all makes sense. Considering the injury prevents them from lifting more than 10 pounds. Prevents them from being able to stand for long periods of time, or walk for long periods of time.

It's crazy, really how one thing...can change everything.
How the outgoing can become shy an reclusive. 
How behaviors and actions can change.

I get it.

Like after something traumatizing.
Things change.
Like how there's a bit more paranoia with my roomies and I whenever we hear the word fire, smell the smoke from fires....all because of our house nearly catching fire back in June.
Or you know, like three? Yah I think it was three years ago, when I ended up with that issue with my left arm, where my lymphnodes swelled up and I was prevented from using that limb to scrub tanks.

I mean, I still have marks from that.
I still don't use my left arm to scrub tanks.
Even though I've been able to for a bit over a year or so now. 

There's just that....slight worry.
Of it coming back.
Of there being a bigger issue.
….lol plus I don't want to have to keep taking on and off my watch to scrub tanks with my left hand. ^^;;

But that conversation with the customer made me think....
Are there things I'm avoiding. Are there things I'm not doing.
Because I don't want to experience something? Don't want to see someone? Am I preventing myself from enjoying something because of a fear of what could be? 

Yah.
Yah I am.

So.
With a bit of trepidation.
I decided to face one of those stressors in my life.
And take it as it comes.

For a while now, I've been craving fries.
And really, it would be so easy to grab those fries as there's a place that serves them is right up the street from where I work.

Only I haven't gone.
Because I didn't want to face a potentially awkward encounter.

I mean, there's other places that serves those fries in the valley.
They're just...not as convenient to get to. They're out of my normal routes I drive. 

So I just haven't gone. 

Today though.
I chose to go.
To the place up the street.

To grab those fries.

As I reasoned, that the chances of having that encounter....were low.
I mean, things change, people move, the time of day was different.

Soooo
I figured I'd go.
And if I had the encounter, I would make the best of it.

The result?

I got my fries!! :D
Lol and had an enjoyable conversation with the workers there, without having to deal with the potential awkward.

And ah. Those fries were glorious. ^^;;
Seriously.
So happy I went.

It definitely brought a boost to my flagging energy and a smile to my lips.

Yay. ^^;; 

Until you next see these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi