Anxiously Stressed Overload

It wasn't a good day for me yesterday.

I mean it started off with the work stress and such.

But it got added to an hour before I was off, when I ate a fruit snack...and had one of my fillings fall out from chewing it. 

I mean...I get it...fillings fall out. 
I never like it when it does though. Because usually it means there's this ragged annoying space for my tongue to play with.

This time, not so much. It was a filling in tooth 20. My lower left 2nd premolar.
And it was a filling that was between the teeth. 19&20 so like...there wasn't as obvious of a gap for my tongue to mess with. And it was a smoother gap that I could fill.
Honestly it took me a moment to figure out where the filling had come from.

And after a test of cold water.
I knew that it wasn't that major of an issue to have the filling out. As the tooth wasn't cold sensitive so yay. lol. 

In any case.
I don't like fillings being missing from my teeth because who knows what could go wrong and what food particles could cause havoc there in the space. 

So as soon as I got a moment to step away.
I called my dentist to set up an appointment.

I was hoping for sometime this week -though with the really short hours the dentist has...I knew it was unlikely- because I'm going out of town on vacation next week and it would be less stressful for me to get it fixed before I went so I wouldn't be worrying about it throughout my vacation.

However.
Dude to their early hours and the fact that I work mornings and they're only open every other Friday (which is my day off) and they were off this Friday....
The earliest I could get an appointment was like the 22nd of April.
And I had to make a sacrifice for that. Where I would need to request a short shift from work.
But I couldn't get earlier because I was already scheduled to work/on vacation before that point.

And if I waited until they had an open Friday...well it would be mid May before I could get in.
So. I made the choice.
And was fine with it.
I mean...not the best. But I've had fillings out before and I haven't had any major issues with them when I've waited a month or so to get them filled again.

So it wasn't the greatest thing.
but I could deal with it.

However.
When I mentioned it to the family I'm visiting next week...
They freaked out. 
Crying foul that I would have to wait so long to get the filling done. 
They wanted me to march right in and demand to get it fixed then and there.

And like...I couldn't.
a) I have work and I don't get off until after they're closed and they're an HOUR away.
b) they're closed on my day off.
c) I had already made an appointment.

But no.
I needed to get it fixed.
Call another dentist. Go get it fixed.
Or else they would make sure it got fixed when I came over for a visit and like....

It stressed me out.
I already had a ton of stress yesterday.
And to be badgered and nagged about getting a tooth fixed that wasn't bothering me. Just because it could get infected just....stressed me out.
Honestly I'm surprised I didn't get a headache yesterday from how much stress this was causing me.

Because a) I don't actually trust Doctors or Dentists that much. so b) having a stranger that I didn't know messing with my mouth isn't on my 'to do' list plus c) I had no idea if these strange dentists would cover the filling as I didn't know if my insurance would work with them and d) there is no guarantee that these other dentists could get me in before I left on vacation either.

Most of the time dentists are completely booked out by two weeks or a month or so. 

And not all of them would be able to see me after work if they closed early.
PLUS this freakout was happening AFTER everything was closed so there was nothing I could yesterday anyways.

And it just really upset me.
Upset me that I wasn't being listened to.
That my decision and my scheduling of the original appointment 'wasn't good enough'
Like I know my mouth. I have to use it everyday after all.
I know when something is seriously bothering me.
I know if there's a concern that needs to be seen to earlier or not.

Especially considering they went to my Dad and to my Sister and who knows who else in order to 'convince' me that I needed to 'try harder' to get my tooth fixed sooner.

I really didn't like it. 
It felt like I was told over and over again "no you know nothing, go get it fixed or else!" 
Seriously. I'm not a child. I'm long past graduated from college. Like...I got this adult thing mostly figured out.

So like...why couldn't they trust me when I said I was fine? That I could wait? That it wasn't that big of a deal?

*exhales*

In any case.
It's left me in a bit of an emotional turmoil this past twenty-four hours.
And has caused me far more stress than the original incident ever did. By like ten fold. 

However.
Talking to my work, the managers were willing to help me out if I could find a way to see the dentist this week. Whether it was switching shifts, covering me for a couple of hours, or letting me leave early...they would help me out so I could go see the dentist and therefore get my family off my back about it.

I ended up calling my dentist first.
Just to see if they had any openings whatsoever this week because I would rather get the tooth fixed from the dentist I knew than a random stranger I've never dealt with before who may or may not use different methods than I'm used to and who might screw up my mouth even worse because I don't know them.

Thankfully, my dentist did have an opening for Thursday morning.
Which I could have just like...come into work three hours late...
but considering that we had opening tasks and coming in right as the store opened (if everything went well and I could get back quickly) it wasn't a good idea to have those like three hours before the store opened unused.
So after checking in with my coworker, who worked today and also is working Thursday, I ended up switching shifts with her.

So she would work my morning shift and I would work her evening shift.
That way I wouldn't have to take time off or put my work in a bind to cover me. The shifts would all be done.

Still though. I'm still left a bit bitter about it.
Because like yes I have the morning appointment. So yes I will get my teeth fixed and  yes my work is amazing for letting me do this last minute switcharoo.
But I HATE working this evening shift. The 11-730 is one of the most hated shifts I've ever had to work.
Because like for over a year I had to work Every. Single. Saturday. The 1130-8pm shift and it sucks. Big time. I'm always left so exhausted afterwards that I basically become a zombie once I get home because I have no energy left.
I hate this shift because it basically takes up the entire day. You can't do anything before you can't do anything after you have to basically do all three of your meal periods at work. 
And I hate it. 
With a passion.

I don't like working 8 straight hours of Customer Service.
That's why I work the morning shift. Because I have at least 2-3 hours of non interaction with people as I work to open my department and it's great.

*exhales*

So yah. The tooth is getting fixed, but I'm not looking forward to Thursday at all. 
At. All. 

I hate that shift.
Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate it. 

Until you next see these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi