Truthfully told, when I picked the dates of my little vacation.
The fact that it was Mother Dearest's angelversary that I would be leaving on.
Hadn't hit.
Until after I bought the plane ticket.
But honestly....
I'm kinda glad to fly away for a long weekend.
To end the Angelversary on a figurative high note.
With me soaring away from it all.
And headed out into the Plains to spend time with my Godparents.
And it's just been...a relief really.
To escape out of the state.
Away from the energy and the people and the work.
And just be here.
In the middle of nowhere with them.
It's been so wonderful.
Relaxing.
Just being around my Godparents who are just so full of love and support and are just doing their best to make sure that I'm feeling loved and happy and spoiled.
It's wonderful.
It's something I've been...missing really.
To have someone near me who well...speaks my love language.
As I show my love by giving gifts.
I enjoy giving things to people and seeing their reactions.
But....
My siblings and Daddoo communicate through different love languages.
Mother Dearest was the best at giving gifts.
And I loved it whenever she would go on trips and come back.
Because I knew she'd be bringing back a small souvenir to give to her kids.
Sometimes it would be just a small trinket.
Othertimes she'd give us like a dozen gifts.
But it was great.
Because I knew that she thought of us. That she wanted to make us happy.
Since her passing....
The gift giving has...well decreased.
My roomies and I are doing okay with gift giving.
Mostly it's just us grabbing food for each other.
But they often try to bring back souvenir's from their trips and I do the same.
In anycase.
My godparents are rather great at speaking my love language.
They make sure I have all my favorite snacks and drinks.
They give me little gifts.
It's just...wonderful.
Today they spoiled me rotten.
Taking me to a rock shop.
And just letting me pick out whatever rocks I wanted.
And telling me to not worry about the price.
That it was okay.
Which when Daddoo has constantly been like "I'll bring you back something if you pay me back for it." and has constantly been worrying about money.
-All my family has been worried about money recently.
It's just...a tension release.
To not have to worry about the price.
To allow myself to be 'spoiled.'
They got me a new ring that fits my finger.
They got me a new necklace that just makes me so happy to be wearing.
And then there were a handful of stones that they let me pick out because I liked them.
And it's just...
It's been a while since I've felt this relaxed.
Comfortable.
Loved.
Honestly.
Just being around so much acceptance and people who care for me.
I don't really want to leave.
And to put the cherry on top.
My godparents gave me a key to their house.
So that if I ever felt the need to get away from it all.
If I needed to escape to an oasis.
I could come to them.
Whether or not they were home.
And have access to the house.
And that just...means the world to me.
To have a stable foundation that I know I can return to regardless of anything.
It's everything.
Until you next read these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!
-Sarnic Dirchi
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