Mirror Mirror

You ever have those quiet self doubts.
That are presented every time you look at yourself in a mirror?
But you can't really vocalize aloud because....well just because?

Like you watch other people out there accomplishing things. Meeting the expectations set by society.

And you're left staring in a mirror wondering what is wrong with you that you haven't yet met those same goals? Why aren't you dating anyone? Why aren't you married yet? Why don't you have more friends?

It's those quiet self doubts.
Wondering if it's your hair, your eyes, your voice, your stature, the clothes you're wearing, what you like to do for fun, how clean you keep your room, how often you drink soda, what books you read, what shows you watch, your job....that's stopping people from taking a second look at you.

That are hard to get rid of late at night.
When you're alone.
Staring in the mirror.
Wondering why. 

And it's like...you've been staring at that mirror for so long.
Wondering what's wrong. Why you're not doing things 'right'

That it's surprising....
When people show an interest.
And for some unfathomable reason...
That someone actually wants to get to know you. 
Wants to hang out with you.

It's...weird.
And it's been so long since someone has shown interest that I'm just...left at a loss.
Staring in the mirror.
Wondering how and why. 

I'm trying to not overthink it.
Trying to not Stress about it.
Just have fun and enjoy things in the moment.

But there's this niggling self doubt in the back of my mind.

Just mind-boggled that anything could work out at all.

After all...
The imagine in the mirror hasn't drawn attention before.
Why now? 

Until you next read these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi