It's been....kinda a rough week in most areas of my life.
And it kinda felt like it all came to a head yesterday.
Which isn't surprising when you consider yesterday was the full moon.
But it just felt like...nothing was really going my way yesterday.
First of all, I was still worrying about next week's plans. Trying to figure out arrangements with work and family to see if I could make it to the funeral.
And like...I literally slept until my alarm went off...which considering I worked a mid shift yesterday...was rather impressive. I think I slept like a good 10 hours. Which yah, I get that oversleeping can happen when you're stressed. But ugh.
Didn't think much on it....
Until I was trying to head out the door.
And I could not find my keys.
As I usually always keep them in my jacket pocket or by my purse so I know where they are.
They weren't there.
And like. I knew that I had them recently. Because I drove home from the dentist the day before.
So like. Obviously my keys would be SOMEWHERE in the house.
Though paranoid me wondered if I had somehow dropped them outside...and like maybe someone picked them up? What if someone was going to ROB my house because I lost my keys?!?!
Plus like...HOW could I get to work if I didn't have my keys?!
That was easy. Because I had an extra car key I could use.
And after like a quick search of my yesterday clothes and my normal spots to leave keys...I had to call it because like...I'd recently been reprimanded for being "over 5 minutes late 6 days in January"
And wasn't really in the mood to make it a 7th.
So I left and sent a message to my roomies to keep an eye for my keys.
....
They didn't see them.
So the entire time I'm at work there's this niggling worry in the back of my head. Wondering WHERE those keys are. Like WHERE would I have set them down? I didn't see them outside. But who knows if someone picked them up. But maybe it's like my card the other day and I left it in a bag? I know I dropped them at least once...but was that at the house? It had to be at the house as I moved my car right before heading inside for the night. So like WHERE were they?
This added to the already stessful stress of trying to figure out if I could get my coworker to cover my Tuesday shift. But said coworker was out on vacation. So while I texted to see if they'd be willing to switch shifts....
They didn't respond right away.
Plus. I hadn't heard back yet from my Daddoo. So I was worrying over how he'd take the news knowing we'd lost another family member. and wondering just WHEN he would see my messages. (The answer was midmorning today) and WHAT plans I could make. Because like I couldn't schedule a hotel room until I knew if I would be able to drive up Tuesday or not. Because if my coworker couldn't switch shifts than I might have to same day drive it so I wouldn't need a hotel. And if my Dad decided to join me... would he drive or would I drive? But he's just getting back from a long vacation so would he really want to turn right around and head back out after being home like less than 24 hours? And if he decides not to go would he let me borrow his car for the multi-hour drive? Would he be okay with trading cars so he'd have my car for the 36ish hours I'd need the car?
So yah.... most of this stress was just things out of my control.
I had to WAIT on others. Which was stressing me out. Because I wanted to have a PLAN. And like I was also making soft plans with an Uncle who was trying to figure out his own plans for getting to the funeral...but would those plans change if my dad said yes? If he said no?
So yah. Mentally I was working myself up to a frenzy.
And then we got the 'lovely' (NOT) news that our closing petcare had called out sick.
Which is....So. Very. Frustrating. Because we had a different closing petcare call out Tuesday meaning I had to close Petcare then. And like....literally NO ONE could come in to help cover the evening shift.
Two of them had tests they were taking. Two were out of town. Two were at other jobs.
Like...I just kinda wanted to call it quits right there.
Because I'd managed to trigger myself a migraine at work. And with Every. Single. Person. Saying. NO. that meant that I would be the only one available to stay later. As I was supposed to get off two hours before the store closed. But if I left early then that would just leave my other manager and the cashier in the store.
And like...it's been known to get busy around the point the mid manager leaves.
PLUS we had the fish shipment expected and with the rainy weather we weren't certain if it would arrive early or not (it did thankfully)
So yah. I was suffering.
Mostly from the Migraine. But also from just stressing myself out.
But also being soooo done with my coworkers. Like what even is the point of having people working if they can't come in and help out when others call out. WHY Do they keep calling out?!!?!? I don't get it....like I understand I tend to stay healthier than everyone else....besides my constant migraines. Like I literally only call out sick like maybe thrice a year? And half the time I end up leaving early instead after working a half shift and calling it quits.
Like my Head Manager today was telling me that we already have a couple of workers who've basically already used up their sick time and vacation time for the ENTIRE YEAR and JANUARY isn't OVER YET.
I. Do. Not. Get. It.
And I'm so freaking tired of having to take on the burden of covering everything because no one can come in.
Like I really just want to take an entire month off and leave the store to burn because I need a break. I'm so over it.
In any case.
Migraine. And I ended up working an hour and a half over my end time. Leaving only half an hour before close.
But minor good news is that I did get confirmation from my coworker that we could switch shifts. Which allowed me to at least book a hotel room for the night. So I had one stressor off my plate.
But the rest of the day?
Yah....no.....I did find my keys once I got home -They were buried under some pillows on the couch-
And I did manage to get the migraine to go away after a bit of sleep.
But like....it just felt like all the stresses came crashing down on me yesterday.
I'm hoping since I now have firmer plans for the week in mind that things will be calmer.
But we'll see.
Until you next find these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!
-Sarnic Dirchi
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