Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Late Night Worry

Change is on the horizon.

And....I have no idea how to deal with it.

Really.
I don't.

And when the day winds down, the city starts to glow, and all becomes quiet.

It strikes me.
Worry.
Fear.
You know...all those dark emotions that find it hard to stay put when I'm distracted at work.

But once I get home,
It seems to all come back.

And silently, I start stressing.
About this.
About that.

Really, I shouldn't be, I still have time to figure things out.
But, at the moment.
It's bugging me.
Because I don't feel really in control.
Why?
Because a lot of this change,
is depending on what others decide.

What if this situation happens
What if that falls through
What if.......

And at the moment, I'm only getting by, through little acts of kindness from others.
A text here.
A wave there.
A smile in passing.
A word of compliment.

To let me know.
Even though the big things might not be going so well.
At least the little things are building a foundation towards the solution.
Or at least keeping me more positive until a solution is found.

I hope I find one soon.
This uncertainty is stressing me out.

Until you next read these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

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