Grief

The tears don't come til the light is gone.
The apartment is quiet, for I am alone.
Vulnerable. My mind settles into what I've been avoiding all day.
The knowledge that someone I knew...has died.

The Bishop of My Old Ward died on the last day of July.
Suddenly.
It was a broad side blow.
The thought of 'you are kidding. Right? right?"
Disbelief.
He's gone.
He won't be there in church to smile at the ward this Sunday.
He won't be there to show his compassion.
To council with those who had come to depend on him for advice.

It's just...so hard to comprehend. That he no longer resides here with us in the physical form. I mean, the guy was in his prime. Young. Healthy.
Yet, he died that morning from an apparent heart attack while he started his morning run.

I can't imagine what his family is going through.
To suddenly have your father taken from you?
Especially when so much happiness was happening?
A marriage, an engagement, a returning missionary.
And he's gone.
Out of our lives,
if not out of our hearts.

The knowledge has been in the back of my mind all day.
He's gone.
He's gone.
Yet, I've managed to distract myself until now.
To not dwell on it.

Now, alone, with the distractions gone for the day, sitting in the darkness. It's hitting me like a ton of bricks. He's gone. A Bishop, A Father, A Friend.

Who knows why those we know are suddenly taken from us. It's all in the Lord's timing.

I just know...that even though he was my bishop for only a little while, I'll miss him. Miss his presence when I visit that ward. Miss his dedication, his compassion, his humor.....

I'm going to miss him.

Until you next see these words;
Be sure to enjoy the day.

-Sarnic Dirchi