A Break from the Spotlight

Do you ever have a....I guess you would call it a 'nervous tick?"
or A nervous Habit? Perhaps its nothing about nerves at all...its just something you find yourself doing when bored, or when you need to do something with your hands?

Yah...today I was noticing a 'habit' I have rather strongly.
I tend to take one arm -usually my left arm.
and move it behind my back to grab onto my other arm.

I started doing this in Elementary school...kind of in a "I think this looks cool" concept.
Now I do it....somewhat as a comfort. When I'm feeling a bit....I guess uneasy.
But I also do it...when bored...when I'm standing there...and I have nothing to do with my hands.

So I guess overall its my "At ease" posture. Where I can stand there like that for hours on end.

Only...I can't.
I've been working on keeping my hands at my side....to make myself seem more open. So that I'm not 'closed off' and not a 'shrinking violet' ether.
lol...its difficult.
I caught my hand moving behind my back to grab my other arm half a dozen times at least.
It was actually kind of funny.
I get distracted for a moment.
And there it goes.
My left arm, like it has a mind of its own. To go grab my right arm.
Haha.
It would move. I would glance to it and it would jerk back into position.
Almost like a dog...trying to sneak away and get the food off the table...
It would move then act like it hadn't done anything when I glanced in that direction.

:) It was intriguing to feel like...I couldn't control my arm fully.
That it had an ulterior purpose.
*shrugs*
I had the thought...that since its my left arm....maybe it sometimes gets tired of having all the attention.
What Attention? You may ask....
Well...I'm left handed.
So that tends to get me attention.
And I guess my left hand...doesn't want to be in the 'spotlight' all the time.
So it goes behind my back to grasp on to my right arm.
So my right hand is essentially now in the spotlight.
Because all you can see of my left arm...is shoulder to elbow.
So right hand now gets the attention.
and left hand gets a break from the spotlight.

Hmm....interesting....a break from the spotlight.
My left hand likes to take those alot when its not in use. :)
Now the question is....should I 'break that habit.'
Hmmmm....

Until you next read these words;
I'll be watching the leaves.
Enjoy the day!

-Sarnic Dirchi

The Dream

I was in a parking garage.
Trying to get out, because I had something to do.
I was driving my car...which sometimes was green, other times it was white.
I was trying to get through a narrower area.
Really quick.
And ended up scraping up the side, the right side of the car against a yellow post thing.
I parked in a....restaurant parking lot.
To check out the damage.
And it looked like I'd basically 'crunched' the front of the car.
Or at least that right side of the car.
The side was all wavy and crunched.
Yah...I was starting to panic.
How could I make it look like I hadn't just hurt the car really bad.
-The car was white. It looked like My Mom's Parent's car.-
At some point my Dad's parents also came into the picture...
Wanting something...I think we were getting ready to go eat...to go pick up something...someone...

Then the unholy tones of daylight pulled me away....
and I became myself again.

-S.N.D